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THE LEGEND OF TARZAN (2016)

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tarzan3Watching The Legend of Tarzan, I began to wonder if there are any snakes or scorpions in the Congo that possess sleep-inducing venom.

Director David (Harry Potter) Yates’ ode to Alexander Skarsgard’s neck muscles nearly put me in a trance, and no, not because of the actor’s ripped bod.

Our hero, John Clayton, aka Tarzan (Skarsgard), is the British aristocrat raised by the apes in the African jungle. It’s 1884, and John and his alarmingly empowered wife Jane (Margot Robbie), have lived in grey, rainy England for the past decade.

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Enter George Washington Williams (Samuel L. Jackson), based on a real-life activist, pastor, writer, and American Civil War veteran. The movie takes this little-known but towering figure and teams him up with Tarzan to investigate the Belgian King Leopold’s Congo Free State, which he runs as his personal fief.

An agent for the King, Leon Rom, schemes to turn Tarzan over to a local chief (Djimon Hounsou) in exchange for diamonds that will solve Leopold’s debt problems. Rom (Christoph Waltz) kidnaps Jane, and Tarzan and George give chase.

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Yates and writers Adam Cozad (the 2014 Jack Ryan reboot) and Craig Brewer have had the admittedly tricky task of tackling the imperialist baggage of Edgar Rice Burroughs’ tale and producing a blockbuster for a global audience.

But as soon as the opening sequence’s mists clear, what emerges is a pretty unremarkable reboot with some sub-par CGI – there is nothing in this jungle that likes to bite.

Even the actors can’t liven it up much; Samuel L. Jackson’s wisecracks bounce straight off Skarsgard’s abs, while Margot Robbie seems bored, and almost banking on Suicide Squad to launch her to stardom.

The Verdict

Indiana Jones might have read Tarzan in his youth, but this is Indiana Jones minus the gusto and the comic touches.

 

The Legend of Tarzan’ stars: Alexander Skarsgard, Samuel L Jackson, Christophe Waltz, Margot Robbie

2.5/5

I live by the sea near my original hometown Portsmouth – the UK’s only island city! (That makes it sound way better than it really is.) When I say I’m ‘near Portsmouth’, I’m actually over the water on the Isle of Wight. My parents moved here when I was three. They took me with them. I loved books and wanted to be a writer or an actress. When I was ten my dad told my mother to stop buying me books because he didn’t want me to get “big-headed”. I left school at 13 (I have something in common with Jennifer Lawrence!) and then shortly after I went back to The Mainland. Amazingly, I went to university, where I acted in plays. I wanted to be an actress but stage fright nixed that. I’m currently stranded back on the Isle of Wight. After university, I went to live with my dad again. I was his caretaker through his depression, cancer and pulmonary fibrosis. He died October 2018. Slow to the Party was born the following year. I’d blogged on and off for a bit, but it helped me after his death to dedicate myself to it, while I rebuild (hopefully) my new life. I’m always a little slow to the party. Stuff just gets in the way.

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Tenet | Official Trailer #2 – HD

Tenet is an upcoming action thriller film written and directed by Christopher Nolan and produced by Nolan and Emma Thomas. It stars John David Washington, Robert Pattinson, Elizabeth Debicki, Dimple Kapadia, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Clémence Poésy, Michael Caine, and Kenneth Branagh.

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Genre:

Action, Drama, Thriller

Release Date:

July 17, 2020

Director:

Christopher Nolan

Cast:

John David Washington, Robert Pattinson, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Kenneth Branagh, Elizabeth Debicki, Michael Caine

Plot Summary:

Tenet is an upcoming action thriller film written and directed by Christopher Nolan and produced by Nolan and Emma Thomas. It stars John David Washington, Robert Pattinson, Elizabeth Debicki, Dimple Kapadia, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Clémence Poésy, Michael Caine, and Kenneth Branagh.

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Netflix: The Old Guard | Official Trailer – HD

A covert team of immortal mercenaries are suddenly exposed and must now fight to keep their identity a secret just as an unexpected new member is discovered.

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Genre:

action, fantasy

Release Date:

July 10, 2020

Director:

Gina Prince-Bythewood

Cast:

Charlize Theron, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Harry Melling, Matthias Schoenaerts, Kiki Lane, Van Veronica Ngo

Plot Summary:

A covert team of immortal mercenaries are suddenly exposed and must now fight to keep their identity a secret just as an unexpected new member is discovered.

 

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Jumanji : The Next Level | Entertainment Packed With Sometimes Masterful CGI

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If you touch my boobs, I will murder you!
Too late! That was the first thing I did.

 

In recent years, the terms “Remake” and “Reboot” have become very popular in Hollywood. Much to my annoyance. In most cases, these knockoffs are just a shadow of the original. Not to say abominably bad and horrible to look at. The biggest example of this (for me personally anyway) is the movie “Ghostbusters” from 2016. If Bill Murray was no longer among the living, he would have turned around in his grave. A needless copy without humor and full of recycled ideas. A few years ago when I was told that a remake was being made of the famous film “Jumanji” (with the unparalleled Robin Williams in a leading role) from 1995, I was shocked. And certainly when it turned out that Dwayne Johnson hijacked the leading role. Yet another redundant and ridiculous attempt to imitate a past milestone.

 

Jumanji : The Next Level

 

Old Skool console game.

To my surprise, however, “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle” turned out to be an exceptionally successful experiment. And that’s because of the unique idea to replace the “Jumanji board game” with an old skool console game where four innocent students are teleported into and where they need to complete a quest while playing a character in this game. It’s the only way to escape the game. Not only was it a funny movie (due to the interactions and personality contradictions between the real youngsters and their avatar in the video game). The concept was also original. Adding video game features such as NPCs, cut scenes, and the fact that each character has a limited number of lives, was a masterful move. It’s not without reason that the film was a real success in the theaters. And the inevitable happened. The sequel “Jumanji: The next level” is a fact.

 

Jumanji : The Next Level

 

Next level?

Unfortunately, as I feared, this new sequel doesn’t take the saga to a new level. To be honest, I thought it was simply an uninspired story that simply tries to take advantage of the previous film’s success. An easy solution to squeeze the last dollars out of a milked-out project. The novelties can be counted on a broken abacus. Not many, in this case. The characters are all still the same. This time supplemented with two old grumpy retirees (Danny DeVito and Danny Glover) who used to be business partners when they owned a thriving restaurant. As with every new level in a video game, the environment in which the adventure takes place is different from the previous level. So you’ll be presented with a sandy location with associated oases. And also, our friends will encounter a completely different fauna on their path.

 

Jumanji : The Next Level

 

Let’s bury this devilish game once and for all.

The most successful aspect of this sequel is the fact that the different characters were initially mixed. That makes for hilarious moments when you see Dwayne Johnson imitating the characteristics of a Dany DeVito. But besides that, there’s nothing innovative to discover in this sequel. It’s a well-known story with a new look. It’s the same as when a new “FIFA Soccer” version is being released on the game market. Graphically it may look a bit sharper and some new players and options have been added. But otherwise, the look and feel are similar and you have trouble discovering the points of improvement. Well, “Jumanji: The Next Level” was entertaining and packed with sometimes masterful CGI. A good alternative to fill a pleasant movie night. But the source from which creative ideas are created is exhausted. Let’s hope they bury the game “Jumanji” in a well-hidden spot once and for all, so nobody can lay their hands on it again. I think we’ve had enough of this.

 

 

My rating 5/10
Links: IMDB

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